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Tuna meltdown: Internet breaks after Sen. Mark Warner’s sandwich tutorial

Sen. Mark Warner, D-Va., speaks with Roll Call in his office in the Hart Senate Office Building on Tuesday, Sept. 25, 2018.
Sen. Mark Warner, D-Va., speaks with Roll Call in his office in the Hart Senate Office Building on Tuesday, Sept. 25, 2018. (Bill Clark/CQ Roll Call file photo)

Two slices of bread, medium cheddar cheese and a can of tuna. Throw in a microwave, and we officially have a recipe for disaster.

“Mark, we need to talk,” tweeted Sen. Kamala Harris. “Call. Please.”

Her plea was in response to a (controversial) video in which Virginia Sen. Mark Warner showcases his take on a classic tuna melt (emphasis on “his take”).

“Unless you’re a professional chef, you may want to occasionally pause the video so you can keep up,” Warner says earnestly from the kitchen.

What followed was an abusive serving of mayonnaise slathered across two pieces of white bread soaked in can-juice.

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It wasn’t long before the internet discovered why Warner’s wife and kids had abandoned what he calls a “real specialty” long ago.

“Horrified he didn’t drain his tuna water,” Rep. Don Beyer said in a tweet. “That’s too much mayonnaise.”

“Ok, Internet, I asked him your questions. And he wants you to know that he **intentionally** didn’t drain the tuna ‘because I didn’t want it to be too dry,’” tweeted Warner’s communications director, Rachel Cohen, in full crisis response mode, even as she washed her hands of the whole affair.

“Guys obviously the tuna video was not my idea,” she wrote.

The upside to the recipe? You can correctly lather up your hands with soap and water in the 30 seconds it takes to microwave it.

“We will get through this, Virginia, we will get through this, America,” Warner says at the end of the video. (It’s unclear whether he’s referring to the current pandemic or his sandwich.)

[ Quarantine beards: Lawmakers fall into scruff and shadows as extended recess takes its toll ]

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