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Starring Nancy Pelosi?

House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) is the star of a new “movie” about the “No Party,” a spoof produced, not surprisingly, by the House Republican Conference. [IMGCAP(1)]

The movie, a takeoff on a CapitalOne ad featuring comedian David Spade and appearing on the RNC’s Web site, takes place in what is supposed to be Pelosi’s office. An actor

(a Republican, we presume) plays a dorky, badly dressed Democratic staffer answering the phones in the Minority Leader’s office.

“Hello,” the staffer says. The voice of a curious constituent on the other end says, “Hi, I’m calling to find out if Democrats have a common sense agenda chock full of meaningful initiatives for American families.”

“No,” the staffer says.

The constituent goes on to ask if the Democrats have plans to strengthen Social Security and the economy, improve health care and strengthen border security. “No” is the answer to each question.

On border security, the smart aleck staffer, sitting at a computer with a sign over it that reads “No is the Democrat Policy,” begins to speak in Spanish and says, “Como se dice … No?”

The angry constituent then asks, “Where is your supervisor?” The staffer answers, “That would be a San Francis-No.” He then tells the constituent, “No. That’s Democrat Policy, buddy. Start liking it.”

While Republicans were proud of their movie-making skills, Democrats weren’t laughing. “If this is how the Republicans are spending our taxpayer dollars, no wonder we have a record deficit,” Pelosi spokesman Brendan Daly told HOH. “The Republicans should be doing a video for the president — show me the plan for Social Security.”

Voices Facing Off. The hot air will be blowing even faster and more furiously than usual today.

Politically polar opposite radio talk show hosts G. Gordon Liddy and Al Franken are squaring off in a live battle of the smack talkers, a main attraction of the three-day Conservative Political Action Conference that begins today.

From noon to 1 p.m., right-winger Liddy and left-winger Franken will broadcast their respective shows live from the atrium of the Ronald Reagan Building and International Trade Center. Different shows, but they’ll be face to face in the atrium.

Stuart Roy, who recently left House Majority Leader Tom DeLay’s (R-Texas) office and is handling public relations strategy for the conference, says the Liddy-Franken matchup could be the loudest political scream fest we’ve heard in a long time.

“There hasn’t been this much trash talk since Ali-Foreman at the Rumble in the Jungle.” The only difference with the Liddy/Franken fight, Roy said, is that it will leave “everyone punch drunk ’cause there’s no rope-a-dope strategy allowed.”

Liddy is going into the event like a real sweetheart. “Despite the fact that Al and I are 180 degrees opposite on our views, we are good friends and I look forward to having a good time with him on this joint broadcast,” Liddy said.

Franken, on the other hand, heads into today’s match with his fangs out. The Air America host said he looks forward to facing off with his “good friend G. That’s how good of friends we are. I get to call him G.”

Then, the KO: “Only a few people are that close to G. And most of them are either dead or in prison,” Franken added.

The Nanny and the Chairman. Nasally actress Fran Drescher — still known after all these years as “The Nanny” or as Bobbi Flekman from “Spinal Tap” — had a nice visit with Sen. Arlen Specter (R-Pa.) while she was in town a few weeks ago lobbying for legislation to prevent gynecological cancer.

A Congressional source told HOH that Drescher dined with the Senate Judiciary chairman at La Chaumiere, one of his favorite spots in Georgetown. Drescher took her friend Courtney (no last name provided) along to dinner, and the Senator, in turn, took his friend Roger Stone, a longtime friend and political adviser.

HOH ran into Drescher at a party while she was in town and she confirmed that she did, indeed, have a “lovely dinner” with Specter. “I always enjoy spending time with the Senator,” she said.

She also said Specter invited her to appear before “some subcommittee” to talk about “Johanna’s Law” as its known on the House side, a bill aimed at educating doctors and women about early warning signs of gynecological cancer.

Specter, who was home in Philadelphia on Wednesday after his office announced he was suffering from Hodgkin’s Disease, said through a spokesman that he is a “longstanding friend and fan of Ms. Drescher.” The spokesman said the Senator “understands the importance of her advocacy for gynecological cancer and is always interested to hear what’s she been up to.”

That said, there’s little chance that Specter, 75, will be appearing on the 47-year-old Drescher’s upcoming series on the WB Network, “Living With Fran.” The show was inspired by Drescher’s relationship with her ex-boyfriend, who was 16 years younger.

HOH wishes Sen. Specter a speedy recovery.

Daschle Farewell Bash. Friends of ousted Senate Minority Leader Tom Daschle (D-S.D.) are holding a huge tribute dinner for him at the National Building Museum on March 1. Speakers include Daschle’s successor, the new Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid (D-Nev.), Sen. Edward Kennedy (D-Mass.) and House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.).

The scores of invited guests include: movie producer Steven Spielberg, a Daschle supporter and friend; Al Neuharth, founder of USA Today and a fellow South Dakotan; Tom Brokaw, another fellow South Dakotan; former Vice President Al Gore; and the grand poobah of the party — former President Bill Clinton and his wife, Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton (D-N.Y.). Current and former Democratic Members of Congress are also invited.

Former Daschle spokesman Todd Webster said the party is an “opportunity for friends and supporters to pay their respects to a leader who has done a tremendous amount for the cause and the country.”

Daschle has received offers from law firms, investment houses, universities and nonprofits, but he has made no decisions yet about his future plans, Webster said.

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