“Where do you even find a muffin that costs $16? I’ve never seen one. Maybe they’re shipped in from a special bakery in France with some secret ingredient. My favorite bakery, Rao’s, in Beaumont, Texas, tells me these things should be about $2 apiece.”

— Rep. Ted Poe (R-Texas) marveling at the grossly overpriced pastries the Capitol Hilton reportedly foisted on Department of Justice conferees.