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Nine Things We’ve Learned at CPAC (So Far)

It’s CPAC time in Washington once again, and HOH is all over the conservative confab.

Here’s what we’ve taken away so far:

8. Bow ties and sweater vests are still rock-solid status symbols. But mohawks and visible tattoos are clearly on the rise.

7. The name on everyone’s lips: Ronald Reagan.

6. The secret to standing out among job interviewees? Give thoughtful gifts.

5. 2012 mantra: “I consider myself a conservative, but not really a Republican”

4. Kirk Cameron is convinced that the solution to all our governmental ills is enshrined in the National Monument to the Forefathers in Plymouth, Mass. (All will be revealed March 27, when his new documentary-style saga, “Monumental,” hits theaters for a one-night-only engagement.)

3. After the long, sordid nomination battle, the eventual GOP nominee SHOULD be able to wipe the floor with President Barack Obama in the first head-to-head debate — as long as it’s a teleprompter-free zone.

2. Most prevalent iconography: Sarah Palin on horseback.

1. “Shoot it. Eat it. And if there’s anything left, hang it on your wall. That’s America!”

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