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Politicians Opt to Swap Sweets, Brews and ‘Cue in World Series Bets

Whichever club clinches the best-of-seven World Series — be it the back-after-nearly-three-decades Kansas City Royals or the ring-collecting San Francisco Giants — stands to earn their respective congressional delegations a humdinger of a celebratory feast.

Democrats in both chambers have seized on the season-ending baseball saga (Game 1 is scheduled for Tuesday at 8:07 p.m. in Kansas City, Missouri) as an opportunity to talk smack to one another and trumpet their most prized regional spoils.

Over in the House, Minority Leader and self-styled cacao connoisseur Nancy Pelosi of California would presumably treat Rep. Emmanuel Cleaver II of Missouri to a basket of gourmet confections should the Royals complete their Cinderella story.

A Pelosi aide confirmed that she has, in the past, rewarded others with samples of Ghirardelli and TCHO creations. “But of course we don’t plan on giving up any chocolate,” Team Pelosi suggested.

Cleaver has countered with the promise of a president’s platter from Gates Bar-B-Q, which is renowned for its pork ribs and burnt ends.

“I don’t usually gamble, but I will make an exception and wager some of the finest barbecue Kansas City, Missouri, has to offer,” Cleaver said in a statement. “Victory shall be sweet indeed.”

Senators upped the ante significantly, throwing craft brews and artisan breads into the mix.

Claire McCaskill of Missouri has put Arthur Bryant’s BBQ and Boulevard Brewing Company on the table in her bet against Dianne Feinstein of California.

I’m partial to the citrusy pop of Tank 7 Farmhouse Ale and the malty richness of Dark Truth Stout. (Not that McCaskill expects Feinstein to enjoy a single sip of Boulevard any time soon.)

“Anyone who likes baseball and has watched this team has fallen in love,” McCaskill said in a press release. “I look forward to the Royals showing the Giants what the word team really means.”

Feinstein appears to be the most confident of ‘em all, offering up a veritable smorgasbord of grains, dairy, seafood and dessert for McCaskill.

Feinstein’s proposed prize pack includes:

Politicians Opt to Swap Sweets, Brews and Cue in World Series Bets
  • Fresh Dungeness crab.
  • Ghirardelli Chocolate.
Politicians Opt to Swap Sweets, Brews and Cue in World Series Bets

“This feast, like our baseball prowess, epitomizes the greatness of San Francisco,” Feinstein asserted in a release.

Let the games begin.

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