Thank you, Topaz Bar cocktail impresario Rico Wisner, for going big on Super Tuesday.

At its March 6 “Super Tuesday Viewing Party,” the Topaz (1733 N St. NW) will unveil Wisner’s quintet of specialty drinks modeled after the remaining presidential hopefuls. They look guaranteed to leave you punchier than the campaign press corps:

• The Romney Float: Old Dominion Root Beer topped with whipped cream and “Salted Lake” caramel drizzle (can be de-Mormonized with a supplementary shot of Root liqueur);

• Rick’s Tea Party: green-tea-infused vodka married to Benedictine, lemon juice and simple syrup;

• Ron’s PBR: old-school can of Pabst Blue Ribbon;

• Gin-grich and Tonic: dry gin and tonic water spruced up with a float of peach liqueur;

• Home Sweet Home: a Rickey redux featuring bourbon, lime juice, club soda and pineapple juice to commemorate President Barack Obama’s Hawaiian roots.

Finally, something that unites us, not divides us.