No one, particularly those who work in a town where oversized egos are more prevalent than America flag lapel pins, wants to think of himself as being non-essential.

The good news is, even if you awaken Tuesday only to discover you are not the lifeblood of the federal government, the local restaurant scene wants to make sure that, at the very least, you won’t starve to death.

Sprinkles Cupcakes (3015 M St. NW) will treat federal employees who flash a government ID to one free gourmet cupcake (any flavor) from 9 a.m. to 9 p.m. on Tuesday.

Chainlet Z-Burger is going bigger, pledging one free burger (plain, cheese or bacon-topped) for badge-flashing feds — and D.C. government aides — at lunch (11 a.m.-1 p.m.) and dinner (5-7 p.m.) at any of its four locations for the duration of any shutdown.

Need something a little stronger?

Port City Brewing Co. is shaving 20 percent off draft pints and growler fills of the Essential Pale Ale for those who trek out to the Alexandria, Va., (3950 Wheeler Ave.) tasting room; no staff ID required.

And while not actually contingent on any government implosion, the flagship Tortilla Coast couldn’t have picked a better time to resurrect its monthlong “Texas State Fair” promotion.

The Capitol Hill mainstay is celebrating all things Lone Star State from now until Oct. 20, serving up a number of dishes of downhome-style nosh that should help dull the pain of being relegated to the political sidelines for a while.

A frosty Shiner Bock Black always takes the edge off.

Mini corn dogs allow you to eat your feelings, one sweet cornmeal-wrapped nibble at a time.

Traditional Fritos pie makes it easy to knock off essential Tex-Mex food groups — chili, queso and corn chips (like tortillas, ‘cept different) — all in one sitting.

And what pity party is complete without a deep-fried, honey drizzled snack cake?

No ID needed to partake in Tortilla Coast’s specialty fare. And $1 of every specialty entree gets donated to the Capital Area Food Bank — because charities often have to pick up where the government leaves off.