Rep. Michael G. Grimm is in a heap of trouble over his involvement in the New York City restaurant Healthalicious, a fast-food joint on the Upper East Side he operated before being elected to Congress. The feds have indicted him over what they say are unsavory payroll practices.  

Good thing customer satisfaction wasn’t factored into the equation, because there’s a long trail of unhappy patrons.  

Yelp’s most recent reviews  paint a picture of high prices, mediocre food and questionable sanitation. Jordan K. of Manhattan, last week bemoaned price — “$30 on 2 salads once” — but said the “food tastes pretty fresh whenever I get it. I keep going back, so that’s something.” That less-than-ringing endorsement is about as good as it gets.  

Caitlin H. from Manhattan wrote in March: “Horribly limp, watery and incredibly disappointing 10 dollar Caesar salad. … The only saving grace was the Parmesan cheese. … That is all I ate.”  

In February, Sheila S. of Manhattan advised, “Don’t Go There … The guy who was preparing my salad was using one hand to prepare it and the other hand to pick his nose. No gloves. Then both hands reached toward my salad but I couldn’t tell if he was touching it with his hands or a kitchen utensil as the counter blocked my view. DISGUSTING. I will never go there again.”  

Other user review sites, such as Menu Pages , are less than kind. An anonymous reviewer, perhaps concerned he or she could be thrown off a balcony if true identity was verified, said back in January: “Not good. I would not let anyone in my family eat here again.”  

Scandal-tinged sites tend to attract the curious. But consider yourself forewarned, tourists: If you must go see Grimmalicous, don’t eat.  

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