Former Sen. Alan K. Simpson is truly milking this whole “I’m-retired-and-over-80-so-I-can-say-whatever-I-want-now” thing but good, letting it all hang out in an interview about affairs of the heart with WNYC reporter Anna Sale.  

During her totally frank talk with the randy octogenarian, Sale discovers that the Wyoming Republican favors coarse language (“He peppers his sentence with cuss words,” she observes), reading “Othello” helped him recognize his own jealousy issues and that he still very much enjoys playing grab-ass with his wife of 60 years, Ann Simpson.  

Moreover, the ex-lawmaker has no illusions about what it takes to keep a modern-day marriage from falling apart.  

“It’s called sorting crap. But you have to take risks,” he counsels the divorce-scarred Sale.  

Need to hear more?  

The entirety of the almost NSFW-exchange — which was, curiously, set in motion by Sale’s lovelorn beau — should keep any helpless romantics out there completely riveted.