Heard on the Hill: Drunk Ron Paul Fan Loves Constitution

Posted September 12, 2011 at 6:48pm

In the new season of “Frontier Force” on the National Geographic Channel, a wildly inebriated fan of the Constitution (and of GOP presidential candidate Texas Rep. Ron Paul) gets pulled over by Montana cops and starts shouting about his rights, the conservative blog Right Scoop reported.

This kid — let’s call him Drunk Brian (not his real name) — who is seriously old enough to know better, gets pulled over by the Montana sheriff having imbibed enough alcohol to put him several times over the legal limit.

When the Job-like police officers ask him whether he would take a sobriety test, Drunk Brian says: “Read your Constitution! Alright.”

OK, Drunk Brian. Promise we will, but first will you take a sobriety test?

Nope, the first thing Drunk Brian will do is shout nonsense about the Constitution to the police officers.

Then Drunk Brian will ask, “Why can’t you guys just assume to me that this is my Constitution right?”

“What’s the First Amendment? What’s the First Amendment? What’s the First Amendment?” Drunk Brian demands. “YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW! Ha!”

Then Drunk Brian will say contemptuously, “You took a vow to your Constitution and you don’t even know what it is.”

“What’s the legal limit of hurting somebody?” Drunk Brian will ask the officers, genuinely curious.

Only then will he take the sobriety test, blow an insane 0.301 and get arrested.

Drunk Brian will then shout: “Ron Paul 2012!”

Somewhere Paul is wishing that Drunk Brian loved just about anyone else instead.